Category Archives: Love & Marriage

Handyman husbands and tall buildings

by . Posted on
14 Jul

Scottie has been here this week and we almost have an office!

I had a small cow last week when I realised just how high the piers were and had to explain to my husband that that was not how it was meant to be!  I was then given a lecture on the ergonomics, aerodynamics and engineering of buildings on hills (I tell you what – it’s a good thing we both have a sense of humour!!) but then when I finally walked out onto the floor of the office I decided it  was perfect after all (well, it could be a LITTLE bit closer to the ground, but don’t tell my husband I said so!!)
It looks great, and it’s a really good space so all is very good.  Next week work stops as we have no willing workers on site and Ged has to get back to work and service his screaming clients, but then we are hoping to have both Scottie and Gary back the following week so they can get stuck in and bring about some miracles so the pregnant lady stops fretting about the tick tock countdown to the birth . . . (10 weeks to go!)
Talking of cows, we are STILL waiting for Paddy to bring forth . . . at this rate, we’ll both be doing it together . . . .

SOPHIE LOVE

Wonderful Wedding

by . Posted on
17 Mar

I know I left you hanging . . . but really, that was enough for one read!

OK, where were we . . . ?
Ged and I  were clutching a glass of champagne each (I had done a deal with the baby about this!) and making some rounds of our lovely guests.  We were soon marshalled for photos by our assortment of talented and delightful photographers (all friends) and we pretty much did photos on demand with all our friends and guests who wanted one while everyone else sipped champagne and ate sushi and smoked salmon sandwiches.  Then Ged and I went down to see the horses for some pics with them and for some reason Naughty Tinkerbell (obviously realising that this was a serious photo opportunity and her big chance to shine in the limelight!) suddenly turned into Miss Butter Wouldn’t Melt in her Mouth!  Quite bizarre!
After that miracle we adjourned to the marquee for the meal, the speeches and the small amount of dancing (don’t know quite what happened there – too much talking?)  The food was superb.  Our friends excelled themselves.  Steve Fripp (Ged’s mate) did the pig on the spit which looked and smelt divine and was apparently so succulent and tender that it literally melted in your mouth (of COURSE I didn’t have any!)  Jane and Shirley’s grated organic carrot and raisin salad with my secret, special, lemon and coriander dressing was truly divine and the similarly cheffed potato salad was lovely.  Onc everyone was sated and sufficiently lubricated we kicked off the speeches.  Daddy was first and amazingly restrained – he didn’t talk about the hell I put them all through in my troubled teenage, truculent twenties, tortuous thirties and flirty forties AT ALL!  He just said that they thought I was mad when I wanted to buy the farm and now they knew why I had been so insistent and persistent and that he was bloody glad someone was finally brave enough to take me off his hands!  I had been prepared to blush and hang my head in shame but no need!  Steve was next and told long tales about how he had known Ged since they were nippers together and all the strange boys’ own clubs and sports they had done together.  He, too, was very restrained for fear of telling the McCarthy’s things that they had no idea about in their son.  Then, Ged who said lots of thank you’s, and lord, we have lots of people to thank!  I had always planned on making a speech (you know I like to have the last word!) but when Steve opened up the floor to anyone else who wanted to say a few words, the resounding call was for ‘the bride’ so it was good to have my decision condoned!
Firstly I had to thank Steve for a level of unselfish friendship that was an honour to behold.  He has humbled us all with his decision to serve and to ensure his friend had everything he ever dreamed of and more.  He gave us all a new model for love and friendship.  Then my family who not only came half way around the world to bear witness to a miracle, but came prepared to work to make the miracle happen, and did!  My parents who have supported so wholeheartedly for so long and who, with misgivings, put their money into the farm to make my dream a reality – let’s hope that today they see that they did the right thing.  Then I had to thank MY friends who know me so well, through thick, thin, flaws and more and still talk to me!  Who come to the party every time whether it’s a pity party, a celebration, a wake or a dreaming and support and nurture and applaud.  I love you guys.  Then George who has been the apex on which our world has turned for the last 9 months and who has single-handedly rescued the farm from the relentless twisting arms of lantana and blackberry, the devastation of fireweed and the scourge of bracken.  Who makes us laugh every day and who is a joy to have around.  And then the Grippers who I love with all my heart, Shirley and Marcel who came, and saw and conquered and have remained my friends though our differences have been huge, for over ten years.
Ged and I are very lucky – we finally found each other and in doing so have been embraced by the other’s friends – people of great humour, strength, honour, integrity, humility, joy and love.
Finally I shut up and those much agonised over blueberry tarts made their appearance and were devoured with relish by all present (well done, Jane!).  Then we cut the cake which had been made with so much love by Ged’s Aunt, Fran and just looked and tasted, beautiful.
And then, by popular demand, and thanks to Angus’s ipod we got down and did Nutbush City Limits (twice!)  Which is certainly a novel first dance for the bride (the groom didn’t dance!)
But then, the whole day was completely unique, essentially beautiful, totally from the heart and soul.  Perfect.
Sunday morning we woke to see young Grippers and Millie and Phil and co., coming over the hill to rouse us and we spent a happy morning drinking tea with a succession of risers and downloading their photos into the Mac, reliving the day and enjoying the photographic evidence.  When all the happy campers were up and about we got the bacon and sausages on the barby and indulged in a hearty, greasy hangover cure and then waved goodbye as everyone left soon after.  Ged and I both cried as my family drove away – it was too short, too little time, too much else to do, and it will be too long before we see and spend time with them again.
With just the hard core left (us, Grippers, Steve and family, Gary) we got down to work – checking crockery, cutlery and glassware for cleanliness and breakages, counting and packing them all away as delivered.  It was a relaxed day with friends, talking, discussing, philosophising, character building and assassinating, all the essential accoutrements for the day after.  Finally it was all done and we could relax.  The Grippers got in the river and we just put our feet up.  The Torpy’s (Steve and family) and Gary left us with their cars laden with leftover beer and we had a happy family supper and an early night.  Monday morning saw us up with the larks, still sorting and packing and feeding the children and taking phone calls from Mel whose train to Sydney had turned into a coach (is there more than one Cinderella in this family?) and could she come in the car with me?  So it was all systems go getting hire stuff back to Port Macquarie, picking up Mel from Wauchope, getting Phee’s jabs done for kennels, getting the house and fridge cleared and locked, the chooks chased in their pen and the Grippers to the airport.  And then there was a general reunion at the airport as my parents, Judy and the girls and the Grippers were all on the same flight to Sydney.  So that was a lovely surprise and bonus and we all got to say goodbye without the stress.  Then Ged left to do the last of the running around before his later flight to Sydney and mel, Phee and I set off on the long road down to Sydney (Mel) and Berry Kennels for me and Phee and then back to Sydney for me!
Needless to say it all got done though there were some very tired little soldiers at the end of the day . . . .

Tick, tick, tick . . .

by . Posted on
03 Mar

I left a message for George the other day since he’s been doing his Scarlet  Pimpernel trick and impersonating the invisible man.  It said: ‘tick, tick, tick, George.  That’s the sound of time ticking away in the lead up to 15th March.  WHERE ARE YOU?  Tick, tick, tick . . . ‘

Bless him, he’s kept it on his machine and says it gives him his daily laugh!
The message seems to have worked though because he’s fronted up finally (what’s he trying to do, give me a heart attack?) and has dismantled the cattle yards (at last, at last!) although the constant rain means he’s also created a mud bath on the river flat and down my drive, which after all my dedicated grass seeding over the last five months, has broken my little heart!  Oh well, I guess you pay a price for everything in life!
He’s been back in the big gully by the house snigging out the trees into a big pile for burning and he promises me, faithfully, that next week he and his brother, Rex, are going to be putting up my much maligned semi-circular fence from gate to gate to separate the house paddock from the farm.  This is the fence that I saw as clear as crystal in my mind’s eye from even before I took possession and everyone has told me can’t be done.  Now you know me, the best way to make me bull-headed is to use the word ‘can’t ‘ . . . . so I’ve been patient, persistent, petulant and precious by turns about it and George and I have had many a head to head over  it.  Finally he has capitulated (sometimes the easy way out is the best way forward!) and roped in his younger brother (who looks ten years older than George) to give him a helping hand.
I had to take my car in for a lengthy stay at the car doctor.  I don’t think I told you about my little prang.  The only way I can describe the weather we have had over the last three months is by saying it has been ‘typically English’ . . .  wet, wet, wet.  So when the plumber was her the other week weaving his magic over my new bathroom and getting ready for my new kitchen, he had to drive in with all his tools then drive out again straightaway as the river was rising over the bridge.  When he finished for the day I drove him and his tools back over to the other side of the river to reunite him with his car and was just about to drive down the dip when I thought ‘this looks a bit slippery, he’d better not drive down here’ and I engaged 4 wheel.  To no avail.  Instead of going forwards I slid sideways – straight into the bullbar on George’s truck!  Which, of course, did absolutely no damage to the bullbar, and wiped out my drivers wing!  I guess it never rains, but it pours!
We have been waiting and waiting for the weather to clear even for a day so we can have our farm road graded.  We’ve been waiting since Christmas.  Finally they came on Monday and Tuesday and did a relly great job turning our rutted old goat track into something resembling a road.  On Wednesday we had 4 and a half inches of rain in under 3 hours.  Even the stalwart, resilient, and endlessly optimistic Ged just sat on the verandah and cried.  One step forward, ten steps back, are we ever going to get there . . . are we there yet, are we there yet, are we there yet  . . . ?
You know when I get a bee in my bonnet about something I just go out there and will the universe to please me (!)  Well, last week I got fed up of worrying and waiting about our new kitchen benchtop which with Scott’s heavy work schedule seemed like an impossible dream, and he was having problems with the tallowood etc so I just said ‘Leave it to me!’  I got out the yellow pages, let my fingers do the walking, and my sweet voice do the talking and found a mob in Wauchope prepared to bend over backwards to give me what I wanted.  You’ve never seen anyone get washed, dressed, and in the car so fast – I was like Penelope Pitstop on speed!!
We picked it up on Monday and it looks fantastic.  How far we have come, how long we have journeyed, how much we appreciate this moment in time . . . .

Ring on my finger at last!

by . Posted on
17 Dec
I have a ring!  It’s very hard to take a photo of but you get the general gist – platinum rails with pink diamonds in between (channel set for the initiated) so it is pretty and practical for my life on the farm.  It has taken a bit of getting used to as I have never had a ring on that finger before, plus it is a very big step so all my commitment phobia has been playing havoc with my brain.  That and my hormones which are on a roller coaster, and creating a hair raising ride for all aboard.  Poor Ged!  He really is a saint . . .
George has gone AWOL.  Partly the fact that the slasher is still broken and sitting on the flat (I think I didn’t tell you that the blade sheared apart one day and speared one of the tyres.  George said it was ‘over use’ and I said it was ‘antiquity’!) and all this rain has kept him from us for weeks.  He couldn’t get the tractor in, he couldn’t slash, he couldn’t fence, he couldn’t clear with the root raker . . .  So we have been George-less which is always quieter, duller and less to report . . . .
I finally saw the platypus the other day.  It was midday and the first sunny day after what seems like months of rain, the river was a mud slick and I was taking advantage of the sunshine getting the washing done.  I saw movement in the river out of the corner of my eye and went to investigate.  I couldn’t believe it was him at first.  It was so out of character to be fishing in the middle of the day but there he was – ducking and diving, rolling and revelling in the day.  Presumably he, like us, had been housebound during the downpours and was catching up on his chores!  He was bigger than the only other one I’ve ever seen – about 18 inches to 2 foot long.  Amazing to have a creature that we studied in school as a rare miracle of nature living just below the house . . .
Which reminds me, we found a yabbie (crayfish to the poms!) in Angle Creek the other day so that should keep the kids occupied in March  . . .
Ged has replaced the platform for the Flying Fox so it is much safer and he and George were chopping down trees on the other side so it is now easier to get on and off at the other side.  We still need to put a new ‘floor’ in the fox itself and build a platform on the other side and then really it will be perfect!  We had the most torrential downpour on Sunday afternoon.  Incredible lightening directly overhead and we had a race against nature to get both the cars out and on the other side of the river, by the flying fox, pump some water before another mud slick came down the river (SOMEONE keeps leaving the hose on and using all the water – I can’t imagine who could be SO stupid!!) and finish the mowing which I was in the midst of.  It was a terrifying and amazing experience to be in the eye of the storm, soothing the horses under the giraffe shed.  Ged had got soaked playing with the pump and when I handed him his raincoat he just stripped off and got naked under it (we do embrace our nudity on the farm!!)
We were cooking supper when the phone rang.  One of the Comboyne dairies had sparks and smoke coming out of their sockets, so the sparky had to go out into the wilds and winch himself across the river and go to the rescue.  At 11pm I got a phone call from a woeful fiance ‘I won’t be coming home tonight’ (quite early days for THAT sort of behaviour!!) but he couldn’t get across Tom’s Creek which apparently was a raging torrent, at least a couple of feet  over the bridge and with big logs bobbing in the white water so the poor love had to go back to his old home (which I have denuded of any semblance of comfort – I made him burn it all, remember?) and sleep on the floor.  So one of the jobs over the holidays is to kit out that abode so if we get stuck again, we have somewhere to get warm, dry and rested!
We may be landlocked but we are river and creek bound!

Wheels, Wine and a Ring

by . Posted on
05 Nov

Thanks for all your worried emails re my wobbly wheels!  It turned out that the bone-rattling rides over the roads around here have been loosening the nuts on my bolts and THAT’S why the wheel fell off!  Actually, on consecutive runs over the next few days I found first the nut, then the washer, then the bolt at various stages on the farm road!

So it wasn’t too expensive, and I got my car back on Monday (phew!) and got back into the daily grind of winding up to the office in Comboyne.  It’s been raining for a week now.  So my grass is growing and so are the weeds!  Phoenix has learned to chase the cows away from the water troughs on command, because they love to drink all the horses’ water rather than sliding down the bank to the river and then trying to clamber back up the greasy slopes.  George has been very quiet because the lady who looks after Marcia has been away so he has been at home with her.

Ged finally wined and dined me on Friday.  We are sampling local restaurants so we can recommend fine dining for the folks when they are here in March.  We went to a little BYO restaurant called Fusion 7 with a bottle of Australian Sparkling I had been recommended to try for the wedding.  One sip and I was grimacing as the sugary sweet bubbles tasted like alcoholic lemonade to me – gross!  Back to the drawing board on something cheaper than the Widow for the wedding guests!  But the food was FANTASTIC.  Truly excellent food in this tiny little restaurant in Port Macquarie of all places.  Very pleased with that.  Ged had to drink most of the bottle, but even he couldn’t stomach too much of it!  Needless to say, I drove home!

We put the deposit down on the ring so it’s a work in progress now – 12 pink diamonds in a platinum channel setting – practical for my hard working life, pink diamonds because they are rare and exclusively Australian and platinum because it lasts and hopefully so will we!

We spent the weekend at a succession of parties with Ged’s family.  I was the entertainment as far as I can work out!  The fiancee was wheeled out in front of an enormous number of rellies (haven’t they heard of condoms???!!) at first brother Denis’s 34th Birthday Party on Saturday night, and then dad Denis’s (I know, I know, WHY do people name their children after the father?) 70th on Sunday.  I liked his sister very much, and ditto the next brother up.  I didn’t think much of the eldest but then as Ged used to work for him I know too many tales out of school!   Now I know how intimidating all the out-laws must find OUR family!! And right now I have sworn off a McCarthy Christmas (where can I run, where can I hide??) but who knows, I may mellow as the merryness of the season melts my hardened heart . . . !

Whirlwind Romance . . . Love and Marriage!

by . Posted on
LOVE SIGN
24 Sep

For those of you who haven’t heard the news, here’s the official announcement. I’m getting MARRIED!!

I know it all seems very whirlwind romance, but as Ged says ‘it just feels so RIGHT’. It’s very real and practical and down to earth (it would have to be trying to build this house together!). He has been sure almost from the word go but I am the one who is commitment phobic and every step of the way I have palpitations. He actually asked me at the beginning of September and once I got over the shock I said ‘probably’ (so romantic!!) And then once I’d had a chance to process it all in my head and my heart and know that we have a good solid future together and what we have is strong enough to weather a life together, I said yes.

We kept it to ourselves because it was nice to have this special secret between us but last week we let the cat out of the bag so you can all share in our joy and start booking your flights etc!!

We are already beginning to understand how stressful planning a wedding can be because finding a date that you all agree on has been a nightmare and while I have had to forego my first choice in order to fit in with the UK delegation, and then had to abandon my second choice because of the Catholic contingent, but we have finally found a date that we are sticking with (3rd time lucky!) so set the date in your diaries now . . . . 15th MARCH 2008. Which Ged worked out is exactly a year to the day since we first met on the farm so that actually is perfect (he is such a romantic!)

Ged is already talking about just eloping in order to forego all the stress and fuss . . . But I have to have my big day (finally!)

I feel a bit like Miss Haversham, I’ve been sitting on the shelf in my wedding dress for so long! Time to dust down my frock and chase away the spiders . . . !

It’s a farm wedding and the weather should be perfect (about 70 degrees in the old money) so it’s pretty frocks for the girls and no morning suits for the men. Just light suits or nice shirts and pants (trousers for you poms!). Don’t worry about hats. I just want a relaxed gathering of our nearest and dearest for a real celebration of love in all its myriad guises – friends, family and lots and lots of children. Come for the weekend and enjoy the property and relax and celebrate with us . . . . official invitations to follow.

I’m so happy and content with this strong, safe, supportive man who loves me totally for who and what I am (no holds barred!) It all feels very natural. He’s nothing like anyone I’ve ever fallen for before, and with my track record, that’s a good thing. He’s a good, good man, with a big and generous heart and soul and he’s brave enough to take me on so that’s pretty impressive!!

He’s going to sell his place and we will make Avalon our home – it’s such a magical place. I can’t wait to share it with you all, so start making whatever plans you need to in order to be here for our special day.


MY LOVELY GED . . .

The ‘C’ word . . . Commitment!

by . Posted on
10 Sep

I have had lots of queries from you all about Ged so I suppose I’d better come clean.  He’s 38, 5’10, blue eyes and a reasonable head of hair except the Prince Charles bald spot at the back (but he is definitely going to look like Phil before long).  He is incredibly kind and sweet and loving and for some strange reason thinks that the sun shines out of my a**se (which, considering he works in the solar industry, is a real worry!)  He loves Phee and Tom and the horses and copes well with all their unique foibles – Phee trying to shag him, Tom regurgitating fur balls with monotonous regularity at the moment, and Tinkerbell using every wile and cunning at her disposal to break into the feed (again!)  Good thing I have one perfect Baby . . .

He has forsaken his Aussie meat pie and three dead animals a day diet and completely embraced my limited one.  He says he doesn’t miss the meat, wants to learn to cook the stuff I cook and has lost weight and is looking better for the shift. At this point my Mother will be screaming ‘quick, don’t let him get away!’ and quite possibly getting straight off a plane from The Rockies and on a Roo bound for Down Under so she can chivy things along!!

He’s completely house trained – does the washing up, washing, pegging clothes on the line etc.  He’s also a builder which is a bloody good thing at the moment and a farm boy which means that none of the realities of life on the land worry him one iota.  In fact he has 400 acres just up the road.  We met when he quoted me for the upgrade of the solar system here and during the long process of the purchase we talked regularly on the phone.

He doesn’t seem fazed by any of my foibles (burping, farting, scratching and snoring!).  Someone revive my Mummy!

He wants the 4 C’s – commitment, chaplain, children and did I mention commitment?  Now that’s one C word that I have an exceptional amount of difficulty with so I have been running around in ever increasing circles looking for a way out because it all seems too much, too soon, too unexpected.  And, of course, having been single for so long, I am used to my own company, my own space, the solitary silence that I share with the animals and nature and the peace of the solo sleeper in the double bed . . .

Am I too old and entrenched in my ways to make room for someone who looks after me so thoroughly?  Or do I just need to keep running a little longer til I realise that there’s nowhere to go, nowhere to hide, and that what’s good enough for the rest of the planet might just suit me too?

Luckily Ged (short for Gerard) is patience personifed because we all know I’m not!  In some ways we are very alike but I guess in the important things we are polar opposites.  He knows I’m a complete worry mutton, and he doesn’t (apparently I look very peaceful when I’m sleeping!)  He knows I always have a plan and normally just fits in with it .  He doesn’t drink very often (like me he had a battle with the bottle and can take it or leave it) he doesn’t smoke although he once did so snap there.  He’s also a Gemini which scares me witless and two generations back his family on both sides came from The Emerald Isle (Catholic) . . . .  smelling salts for my Daddy!

He insisted on taking me to meet his family this week which was pretty terrifying.  His father is a blue eyed farmer whose family came from Kangaroo Valley so he great tales to tell and we had mutual acquaintances to discuss.  His mother is a much harder nut to crack – wary, suspicious and assessing so I might have to get a spade and dig deep there if this goes the distance.  Mind you she reads Maeve Binchy and Dick Francis just like me so the heart beats true!  And she’s got the complete works of Banjo Patterson so I will need that spade after all . . .

Running, running scared . . . . . .